Trust: It’s More than a Five Letter Word

trustJust trust God.

‘Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus…

What does that really look like?

The other day, I was over at a friend’s house. We have a Sunday night ritual for a few months out of the year and I was so excited to go over to her house to watch our favorite show! I also couldn’t wait to get over there to catch up with my friend. It had been a crazy couple of weeks since we had been able to hang out.

We were having a party at my house for my mom during the day, so there were 11 extra people at my house. I was so enjoying my family, but as soon as they left, I headed over to my friend’s house. I figured the mess would be there for me when I got back home, so I only put food away, but didn’t clean my kitchen. We spent about an hour talking and sharing how our weeks had gone. Mine had been a rough one and a little venting seemed harmless. She is a safe, God-focused woman who will not allow my venting to turn ugly. She loves me enough to pull me off that path before I get too far.

Anyway, I shared with her some frustrations I had with my husband. We had some great breakthroughs over the weekend, but I was anticipating more change right after. I was disappointed and a little worn from the battle and didn’t want to tell him that, but needed to share with someone. Honestly, I felt better as she spent time encouraging me and letting me know that she has been and will continue to be praying for me.

That night, when I got home it was late. I figured everyone at my house would be asleep and I was right. I came in with determination to get my kitchen clean so as not to start my Monday morning behind. I flipped the light on in the back half of the house and my jaw dropped. My entire kitchen was clean! I mean sparkly clean. The dishwasher had just a few minutes left on its cycle and the pots and pans had been hand washed. Every surface had been wiped off—including the table. I just stared in amazement for a little while.

Then the sweet reminder of the Holy Spirit came over me like a warm blanket. He said,
“Trust me, I am doing a good work.”

Did I trust him? No, I lamented to my friend that I had yet to see a change…a whopping 24 hours after the breakthrough. Wow. I wish I would have just kept my mouth shut and declared that I knew there would be change. See, I believed there would be change, it just wasn’t happening soon enough for my impatient little heart. I was worn and still healing from the wounds of our fight and our counseling. I gave God a teeny tiny timeline and felt (dramatically) abandoned the next day when all was not immediately well.

Trust is more than knowing he will provide.  

Trust is believing with your mind, your mouth, and your actions.

I believed in my mind, but let my mouth run in a different direction. I had actions of a defeated individual that day. I should have believed with my whole being. He was gracious and tender with me in sending me that blessing of a clean kitchen (done by my sweet husband in case you didn’t catch that.) I didn’t feel guilt and shame, but I did text my friend immediately to share what he had done. I told her, “I guess I have a thing or two to learn about trusting God.”

Don’t we all?
I hope this scenario comes to mind the next time I am tempted to being quick to lament and lay my trust down. Even in just holding my tongue, I believe the Enemy feels it. Knowing I am stepping on his toes when I refuse to lament so quickly will help fuel me to hold on to trust!

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