Sacrifices of a “Super” Mom

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I feel that no matter where you are in your mom timeline, whether you are a mom of a 19-year-old and step-mother of 2 like me or of younger children. There is a time in life where we look back and wonder, “Were my children happy? Was I happy with certain decisions or where was I when I…” My life has been full of change and questioning of being what I call a “super” mom. I have not had a strong relationship with Christ most of my adult life. So many of my decisions were carried by my strong will and I am sure most times I was being guided by the Holy Spirit.

At the age of 18, I was pregnant and married. It was my second semester of college. I was studying full time and I was a new wife to a US Marine. Life was chaotic. In November of that same year my son was born. Needless to say my life has been full of sacrifices that I have chosen to take but some I have let “life” make for me.

As Tyler grew up quickly, my son became a “sports” kid. At the age of 4 he was playing tee-ball at the YMCA. And then it just took off from there. As time went on more sports were introduced to his life; basketball, Taekwondo, baseball, soccer and football. He loved them all. There were times that WE (Tyler and I) were playing multiple sports at a time, with probably one week or less separating a new season.

Sacrifice.

His dad and I split up the summer after Tyler finished Kindergarten. He was 6 years old. I became a single mom quite quickly. I have always been blessed to have a work schedule that was easily scheduled around me becoming that “sports” mom. Along with Tyler playing everything, I became team mom to just about every team he was involved with. I attended EVERY practice and game ever imagined. When Tyler was 9 years old I remarried. Then I became a step-mom of 2. At that time my step daughter became involved in soccer. Therefore, now I was juggling two sport schedules and being a “super” mom to not just my son but to my new step-daughter. Yet another sacrifice.

Please don’t get me wrong, by no means am I saying for your child not to get involved in sports or any other activity for that matter. But if I could do a lot of it over again, I might have changed the family focus just a bit. I was so involved in making sure Tyler got to certain practices so he could experience something, that life was in my beat up Honda Civic. When he was having bologna sandwiches for dinner and doing homework in the car from point A to point B, things needed to change. I needed guidance. I didn’t have anyone to turn to. I guess once again in my mom-life I didn’t step out and take care of me. I wasn’t a benefit to Tyler being a mom that only missed 2 games or performances from the age of 4 to his senior year of high school.

I was exhausted and not celebrating my passions and loves because I never took a look back and said stop for both of us.

I sacrificed and Tyler did too from all the GO GO GO that we did together. I never set boundaries for him.

Christ wants us to set boundaries. It’s okay to set boundaries. They are healthy. Physically and spiritually. It’s okay to say stop, it’s okay to breathe, and it’s okay not to be a “Super” Mom.

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