Hope Abiding

get-attachment (14)

Pain. Agonizing pain. It rips through your body and crushes your spirit. The kind that takes all of your strength just to get through the day.

“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18

I have been suffering from chronic pain for over a year now. In March of 2013 I gave birth to my third son. Since then I have had numerous health issues. The main problems being chronic pain throughout my body and migraine headaches. I was getting the migraines about four to five days per week. I couldn’t think straight and no doctor would help me.

Being in constant agonizing pain and being fearful that a migraine could pop up at any moment is exhausting. It is physically exhausting, mentally exhausting, and emotionally exhausting. But, one thing we may not consider is the spiritual toll it takes on us.

“Likewise the Spirit also helps our infirmaties…” Romans 8:26a

I have prayed and pleaded with God for relief. Relief from the horrible grip that this pain has on me. I have read my Bible and studied scripture. I have good days and I have bad days. I have questioned God and His love for me and even gotten angry with Him. Why would he have me suffer in such a way if He loves me? Does He even hear my prayers? 

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” James 1:2-3

After a long time in the valley I am finally at peace with my circumstances. I am still in pain and suffer daily but I know that God has got my back. He is also by my side (Psalm 118:6). Not only that, He goes before me (Deuteronomy 31:8).

He is with me every step of the way and has never left me in my suffering.

I clawed and scratched (and prayed a lot) my way to the top of this mountain from the dark valley of pain. Though I doubted God throughout this process I never gave up hope. It is what has gotten me through so far and what keeps getting me through each day. My hope and my faith in the Lord.

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 (emphasis added)

I hold on to the hope that one day I will be pain free. It fills me with the peace and love of Christ. Afterall, didn’t He suffer the worst kind of death for a wretched sinner like me? He did it willingly so that I could live. Jesus is my HOPE.

Though we may suffer in this life we have the hope that only Christ can give. 

“My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness…” -Edward Mote

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